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by Mish

“We cannot raise property taxes forever. It’s time to get creative. Too many people are having too much fun, while others suffer in misery. We need a tax on fun. Rush street bars and popular pizza restaurants need to pay their fair share,” said the alderman.

The alderman blamed governor Bruce Rauner and mayor Rahm Emanuel for this mess.

Commenting specifically on the plight of Chicago public schools, “We need higher taxes, and more creative taxes, for the kids” screamed the alderman straight into my face.

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Upon further questioning, alderman Markham Upbigg revealed that his wife, Ponita “Pony” Upbigg is a Chicago public school teacher who is concerned about her pension. Pony Upbigg got the last word “Do it for the kids!”

Meanwhile, please let me point out, this is April 1.

Nonetheless, I wonder how far off reality this spoof will eventually prove to be.

Mike “Mish” Shedlock